Jane Doe · Writing Samples

Jane Doe- The Lake (Part 1)

“See the problem,” Fraser could hear that he was slurring his words a little, but he was too far gone to really care. “Is that nothing bloody happens around here.”

“Aye,” Duncan agreed with him. His eyelids were heavy and he wasn’t really listening. The words went in but he was mostly thinking about food. “D’ya think the chippy’s still open?”

“Nah,” Fraser screwed up face. “Shut hours ago, mate. That’s what happens when you live in the arse end of nowhere. Which is exactly my point, pal.”

“Shite,” Duncan looked for a moment like he might cry as he thought about trying to find a bus that would take him in to Aberdeen for some soggy MacDonald’s chips. The boys stumbled along in silence until they reached the point in their journey where Duncan turned off. They stopped and peered at each other in the gloom. “I’m away home to see if I can make some toast without waking my Maw up.”

“Good luck with that.”

“You alright cutting through the park yourself?”


“See you later then,” Duncan wobbled away and Fraser raised an arm lazily in his general direction. He then turned and took a shortcut home past Pitfour Lake.

It had rained a lot recently, which was weird for this time of year. The Lake had grown and the rivers that ran in to her had swollen over the last few days. Even on the beaten and well-worn path the ground was wet and trecherous. He slipped a few times and a little part of him wondered if he should turn back. It was the same little part of him that still didn’t like sleeping with the wardrobe door ajar or with both legs outside the safety of his blankets. He told that little voice to shut up. Even if he slipped and fell in the Lake at least then something would have happened. At least that would be some kind of adventure.

If it hadn’t started raining again he might not have seen it. There was a bit of a wind that blew the rain directly in to his eyes. He stopped walking and turned away from the rain to zip up his coat and pull up his hood. The Lake seemed strangely still in front of him. He noticed how quiet it was and wondered if he could be bothered to untangle his headphones.

Then something caught his eye.

It was floating in the Lake, fairly close to him.What the hell was it? The drink inside him still kept him warm and gave him courage to step forwards, away from the path and a little bit farther down the steepl hill. He peered in to the Lake.

It was an arm- small and pale- strangely luminous against the dark waters.

“Shit!” he clamped a hand over his mouth although there was nobody present who could hear him. He leaned over a little further and saw that the arm was attached to the body of girl. She looked young. Just a child. His stomach churned and he felt sick. “Are you okay?” he called to her, praying in vain that she was somehow still alive. It was this hope that moved him to call for an ambulance before he called for the police. They assured him that they were on their way but when he hung up he felt small and the world felt big. Like it was just him and this little girl.

He wondered how long she had been alone for.

He sat down and talked to her. Just to fill a silence that was now trying to crush him.

She lay face down. Motionless.




Welcome to my first web series. It’s a sci-fi mystery story and I aim to update it weekly. Thank you for stopping by! This is based on a shorter piece I wrote as a response to one of the Daily Prompts over on The Daily Post, but I liked the concept and wanted to expand on it. Any feedback welcome 🙂 

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